Just mADE A PArabola og urine
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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