also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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