Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
