I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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