At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
