I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize