I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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