Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
