Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
My bed smells like the plague
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize