I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
