dude i'm inner monologue high
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize