you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
