At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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