from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
