Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
