Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
