After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
