OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
