that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
