If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
