i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
