Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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