i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
