dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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