Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
he fucked my hip out of place.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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