after a month anything with tits is on the radar
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
