I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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