Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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