....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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