dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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