I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
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