yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
