I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
handjob tips. give me some.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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