I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
i now understand why vodka
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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