She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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