Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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