i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize