It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
