My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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