If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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