So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
