Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
