I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
