when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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