I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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