I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
