so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
