dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
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