So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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