Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize