sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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